The Only Proof of Life Is Death Page 3

least made me seem bright.

  I’ll try to be the man, son and friend you need;

  But if I’m not please don’t blame me,

  After all, I’m just the result of your planted seed.

  But they’ll tell me, no don’t worry it’s all part of a plan,

  Then why isn’t it easier to understand.

  Sometimes I wonder if I would’ve been a better man,

  If a father would’ve been part of my plan.

  70 times 7 is how much we’re to forgive,

  But what if I can’t and I forget how to live.

  Not others, see just myself.

  For the simple vile crimes I’ve committed,

  I can’t do time just imprisonment.

  But the only jail I’ll have is in my mind.

  I’ve already been on my knees enough,

  Come on now where’s that eternal love.

  Three’s a fun number for us both,

  For him he rose,

  For mine I was left on a bed of broken dreams,

  Finding a way to make new arm seams.

  Crying while I laid on my bathroom floor,

  Wondering where He is while the demons close the door.

  My immense fears,

  Only to be matched by my flooding tears.

  Connecting both sides of who I am.

  The one who I appear to everyone as,

  The other who I don’t share with the class.

  But I guess that’s enough about me,

  Let’s talk about you cause things aren’t what they seem.

  Running to, running from, running away,

  Does it really make a difference or change what I’m trying to say?

  No, so just let me be free and try to speak on this new day.

  Maybe it’s not seen as important,

  But still someone needs to speak for us.

  Yeah it’s still a crisis,

  Maybe not as big as ISIS;

  But when life and freedom is taken someone needs to speak and say,

  “No don’t worry tomorrow’s a new day,

  Take this darkness and be a light,

  Thrive in this world and still be bright,

  It’s dark in your head so I know it’s hard to see,

  But tie a knot and hold on trust me.

  Sing a little louder,

  Rap a little faster,

  Write a little harder,

  Whatever it takes to get to the morning after.

  Just worry about today and tomorrow will come free,

  Finally be the one I know you can be.”

  One more thing to say before I stop,

  Better watch where you stop because this mic about to drop.

  Whatever Happened Did Happen at the Subconscious Diner

  The rain pounded on the diner’s walls like soft hail,

  With the neon sign flickering as a potential lighthouse in the storm to no avail.

  I walked inside the diner and in doing so, entered myself.

  “Table for one?” The waitress asked.

  “Actually no, two, I’m meeting myself here.” I said with a laugh.

  And so I was seated in a booth and given a menu to look over,

  Really what’s the point, and I tossed the menu down and shrugged my shoulders.

  And seated at the bar were various individuals,

  A priest, teacher, snake, skeletons, and a smoking criminal.

  What a twisted mind that made those up am I right?

  And so finally I joined myself across the table from me,

  I said, “I’ve been waiting quite a while, what took you so long?

  You know it’s hard to make my schedule free-”

  I interrupted myself, “Just stop with the rhyming, it takes too long. So now what?”

  I said, “Well, I’d like to try to be a better person.”

  I responded, “We all do, try to be original.”

  And I said, “Fine then. I’d like to finally wake up.

  See after my dreaming accident everything has meshed together,

  All my dream memories have become one with my real life memories;

  And I can’t separate the two anymore.

  It’s not that when I sleep I feel alive, or when I wake I feel like I’m dreaming.

  It’s all one fluid state of being numb.

  I can’t remember my past, and in turn I can’t remember who I am,

  And then I can’t see who I’ll be in the future.

  I’m just living a dream,

  Or rather living a death.

  I have no memories of who I am, it’s all a haze.

  Maybe real life begins in the grave.

  Or maybe my life is just all repressed.

  I’m truly living within and without.

  I’ve lost my grip on reality,

  Or rather an idea of it when I thought I had sanity.

  So I believe fatalistically,

  That whatever happens, happens, and is as it’s supposed to be.

  See life’s ending has been a bit ruined for me,

  Spoiler alert, we all die at the end!

  Life’s a lot like a spider web, you don’t see it until it’s over,

  Or in the web’s case when you’ve walked into it.”

  And then I leaned forward across the table, pointed to the bar and said,

  “Do you know what you have in common with all the people at the bar?”

  And after a necessary silence the answer,

  “You’re all human.”

  ###

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